This is the first time I will be flying with a baby and to be doing it alone makes me more than a little nervous. My biggest fears are as follows:
- Poop. Specifically a blow out. Specifically on the airplane. It's hard enough getting myself in and out of a tiny airplane bathroom. Add to this equation my big guy (who is close to outgrowing his 6-month sized clothes) and a diaper full of leaking breastfed baby poop. Not pretty.
- That awkward moment when. I hope I get lucky enough to be sitting next to a woman (even better, another mom) because it's going to be pretty awkward to have to whip out a boob next to Mr. Suit and Tie or Mr. Dirty Old Man. Yes, I have a nursing cover, but let's just say I am not the most graceful at using it. Mason also not a fan.
- The shoes-stroller-backpack-ID-baby-metal detector-ticket juggle. I have enough trouble getting through security by myself. In my head I imagined not even taking a stroller and just wearing baby in
Is this for real?
- Angry glares and heavy sighs. You know there will be that guy that sees a baby coming onto an airplane and internally flips his shit. Then he passive-aggressively gives you dirty looks and mumbles things under his breath the entire flight no matter how well behaved the baby is being, which brings me to number five...
- Total meltdown. Mason goes totally out of character and decides that he is pissed off and there is nothing anybody can do about it. Now, Mason is a pretty chill baby as long as he is with Mommy, so I have that going in my favor. But when he gets upset he lets you know in a not-so-subtle fashion. I'm talking full on red-faced screaming that even a pair of the most expensive noise-cancelling headphones will not tune out. So in the unlikely event that number five happens, I may have to train myself in the art of ninja so that we might escape a plane full of angry travelers with number four rallying them with a speech out of Braveheart.